BOUND needs to make sure he’s putting his trust in the right people.” “Bondage is inherently dangerous, especially when you’re the one being put in bondage, and it requires a lot of trust. “The most important thing is to find good and genuine people to share these kinds of experiences with,” said Heavy. If simply getting to tie you up isn’t enough-if a gay bondage top isn’t interested in a bondage-only scene with you-he’ll decline to play with you. And if someone’s pushy about certain things that he’s unsure about, then they’re likely not the right person for him.”īondage tops on Recon with the kind of gear required to put you in truly restrictive bondage will most likely have heard from other straight and/or straight-identified guys who were in it for the bondage, not the sex. “He needs to have the same conversations he had with his wife about limits, comfortability levels, and intentions. “BOUND just needs to be direct about what he’s looking for when he reaches out to the guys he might like to play with,” said Heavy. You can consent to being a guy’s bondage sub for an evening or a weekend without having to consent to sucking his dick or letting him fuck your ass. What Heavy is suggesting here, BOUND, is that you can meet up with another guy for a heavy bondage scene and enjoy the bondage-and even get off on the bondage-without having “sex”. “I’ve had many bondage encounters that involved sex, but I’ve had even more that were simply about the bondage itself.”
“I view bondage the same as getting together with friends for a round of golf or shooting hoops, watching a movie or game together,” said Heavy. Heavy’s identity ultimately did change-he now identifies as queer-but he wants you to know that your identity doesn’t have to change. “But seeking out other genders to play with doesn’t necessarily have to change your identity.” “I was really worried that if I played with men that meant my identity had to change too,” said Heavy, looking back at that time in his life. And just like you, BOUND, Heavy once felt conflicted about getting tied by other men because he didn’t identify as gay or bisexual at the time. That was the reason he chose “Heavy Bondage For Life” as his porn name. Just like you, BOUND, Heavy was always turned on by extremely heavy bondage scenarios. “I felt very much in this person’s shoes at one point in my life,” said bondage-porn star James “Heavy” Woelfel. Am I silly for considering doing stuff with men even though I’m a lot more attracted to women, just in order to fulfill these kinks? I’ve just recently been feeling less shame about being kinky and now there’s this whole other level of shame that I am scared to contend with. I was bullied and called a faggot constantly. I grew up in a very rural area that was extremely homophobic. And I don’t want the poor guy that I play with to have to deal with my own internal psychological drama. I don’t know if I’ll feel repulsed to have, say, a dick in my mouth. I think the former is going to win, but certain things concern me. It’s like a battle between my identity as a kinkster/fetishist and my identity as straight.
He showed me Recon, which has opened a whole new world up to me. I’ve been talking to a guy who shares a very similar set of kinks, and it’s been great. I think men have a higher propensity to pursue these kinds of things. Since then, I’ve seen some other women, but looking around I came to the realization that gay men have all the fun! I often see these incredibly intense sexual experiences that I so desire in amateur gay porn or on various gay men’s fetish profiles. My wife is incredible, and we do many wonderful kinky things together, but I needed more. In the last year, we opened up our marriage because my sexual desires were putting too much of a strain on the marriage. I’m a 32-year-old straight male who has been married for five years. Think full-body casts or getting locked up for an entire weekend. To give an example, I love long-term and extremely restrictive bondage. I’m extremely kinky, with an emphasis on extreme.